Monday's Mental Images Carved in News Paper

Today's Opening for your Monday is brought to you by Kim Yong June-Un's cousinWelcome to a Monday as we kick start a new week on almost an ending note for March. Today is Mar 30th, the 89th day of the year with 276 days left for more Presidential VetoesPortions of today are closed captioning for the Politically Impaired(whoop whoop whoop) Go Get Em Team. Yeah Republicans!!! Go Go Go...!!!!

WHOOP WHOOP COME ON REPUBLICANS. GO TEAM GO 2016 IS YOUR TIME..YEAH PUSH EM BACK PUSH BACK ALL THE WAY BACK TO RUSSIA...

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SPEAKING OF RUSSIA: Our opening history for this date - In 1867, U.S. Secretary of State William H. Seward reached agreement with Russia to purchase the territory of Alaska for $7.2 million. SOCCER HISTORIAN EXTRAORDINAIRE SARAH PALIN RETORTED.. 

Happy 70th Birthday to Eric Clapton- of Cream, Yardbirds, John Mayall and Blues breakers, Blind Faith...to name a few plus his own solo career. After Midnite, He's gonna let it all hang down and do a little Cocaine

HILLARY 'WIPED HER SERVER CLEAN'...
RNC: 'Even Nixon didn't destroy the tapes'...--Clinton wiped her emails out totally and has none of the emails from her four years as Secretary of State..Yes Madam Secretary Deleted the Slate Clean

Meanwhile what do you do in the White House, when you aren't busy vetoing legislation, meeting with your staff, golfing or just taking it easy??? You take Selfies!!!

ISIS released its latest hostage selfieDamn we look good on Camera don't we Abdul?

MY KINGDOM FOR A SNOW PLOW DAMN IT!!!!

NYC Mayor Bill Di Blasio in the famed NYC WINTER OF MY MAYORAL DISCONTENT PHOTO OP

TRAFFIC ON THE MORNING COMMUTE...HEAVY TOKERS IN THE SMOKER LANE

USA TODAY REPORTED ANOTHER NEWSPAPER CRIME SCENE TODAY

TIME FOR AN INTERMISSIONBROUGHT TO YOU BY THE WASCALLY WORLD OF KIM YONG UN

The Rolling Stones Gathers No Moss Tour is Underwayas soon as it gets Mick Cranked up

Katy Perry's new Single is Roarand its really big with her biggest Fan Tony the Tiger

And the nomination for best Stoic facial expression at a White House press conference goes to Sen Ted Cruz Actually it was a Madame Tussuad wax replica that the good Sen substituted while he went out and got a Beer.

REELING IN THE YEARS..DIRTY HARRY IN 44 MAGNUM RETIREEDID I POINT FIVE TIMES OR SIX, TO TELL THE TRUTH IN ALL THE EXCITEMENT OF FORGETTING TO TAKE MY GERITOL, I LOST TRACK. BUT BEING THIS IS A 44 MAGNUM FINGER AND IT WILL POINT YOUR EYE CLEAN OUT OF YOUR HEAD, YOU GOTTA ASK YOUR SELF THIS QUESTION..DO YOU FEEL LUCKY PUNK, WELL, DO YA?

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That wraps up all the fun and frivolity this Monday can handle. Thanks for letting me into your headlines. Until the next time I can pull together more fluff and stuff for your coffee klatch from the deepest darkest recesses of my warped speed imagination, May your House always be safe from Lions, Tigers, Bears and Sore Oscar losers posing as Wolfs on Wall Street